Hello Ladies! Hope you all are doing well. today I wanted to talk about something that has been bothering me. This post was actually scheduled for next weeks post. But I felt it really strong the last few days that I wanted to write it this week.
Struggling with Mom guilt. Ok so this can mean so many different things. Are you a mom feeling guilty because you have to work? Are you a mom feeling guilty because you are so tired and exhausted from being a stay at home mom? Are you a mom feeling guilty because you want to have some personal time? I can go on and on. So which one are you?
I’m having a few reasons of this so-called “mom guilt” the number one is never feeling like I’m doing enough. And I mean doing enough to contribute with finances. I worked from age 19-35 full-time. That’s 16 years of working Monday-friday full time. I was such an independent women. I loved having my own. I was proud of my work I did. After having my first son, I continued working full time. I honestly can say it wasn’t hard. I had a lot of good help. I loved my job so it felt good to go to work and come home feeling fulfilled. And even more so coming home to my sweet boy. After having my second son. my position was moved to Phoenix, AZ. I was on maternity leave for the last months of my job so I actually never went back after. Fast forward to now almost 5 years later. I’m feeling the need to go back to work. Even though my fiancé works hard to give us what we need and make sure I can be home. I don’t feel right. It’s been a struggle for me. I’m feeling guilty just having these thoughts of wanting to go back to work. My boys need me and I don’t really have anyone that can help out with drop offs and pick ups. So it’s another reason I’m grateful to stay home. But I can’t shake this feeling of wanting to be more and do more. It’s something I’m trying to figure out. But I’m so blessed to be able to stay home with them.
The other reason I’ve been feeling the Mom guilt pretty heavy is my trip. It’s coming up fast about a month and 1 week. As it gets closer I get more and more nervous. I’m getting excited but I’m feeling so guilty. I’ve never taken a trip away from my kids. My oldest I’ve had to leave him a few times due to school when I’ve visited my mom. But Breaker I’ve never even left him overnight. He’s with me 24/7. I’m so happy he will be with Daddy. I’m trying to tell myself that both boys are in good hands and I really need this re-charge. The hubs is all for me going and enjoying myself. I guess we can’t help but to feel guilty.
So many things can bring on the Mommy guilt. It can be so small. I’m trying to work on balance still. I don’t think it gets easier as the kids get older either. Because with a teenager in the house that brings on a whole lot of other worries.
I’m thankful for what I have.I’m not trying to change my life. I’m just trying to find balance in life. Till next post.